Oh man! I dropped a major ball today. I was supposed to lead worship tonight and I totally forgot. I was not even prepared! Two other worship leaders and members of the team bailed me out or I’d been sweating bullets! I still can’t believe I forgot it was my turn! I’m supposed to lead the 2nd and 5th Wednesdays of the month. That’s part of the reason I forgot. I had it in my head it was the first Wednesday. Oh well life happens. Thankfully God showed up in the midst of my blunder! I had a hard time staying focused. We are starting to have a lot more youth attending on Wednesday night that are not used to church and several kept coming in and out of the sanctuary. Was a little unnerving for me. I just well get used to it. I believe this is just the beginning for more to come.
I bought groceries
today for the first time at the new
I did not talk to dad today. I suspect he didn’t go home as he thought because he told me yesterday he would call me from home if he went home. I didn’t hear from him. I did try to call the hospital on the watts line but no one answered the phone. By the time I thought to try again it was time to go to church.
Excerpt from my journal May 2000
God You are my God earnestly Lord I seek You. I need You. I miss You, I want You. I gotta have You! I am so tired. I planned to come home today and sleep. Here it is after 4pm. I could sleep now but I don’t want to go a minute longer without being with You. I love You Lord. I do love You. I am willing to do anything, be anything, go anywhere You desire. All I want to do is please You and cause You joy.
Oh My dearest most precious Daughter. I am so glad you came. We have so much to talk about but you aren’t ready to hear it all now. I love you so much. I will be so glad when you finally understand that I love you just the way you are. You don’t have to read the entire Bible, or pray so many hours of the day. Just choose to “hang out with Me.” You know that in your head but it’s yet to transfer to your heart but it will.
Daddy You are so wonderful. There is no one, no thing who compares to You. You are so loving, so kind, so patient, understanding, encouraging. You correct me when I need it. Thank You for loving me. Keep doing whatever it is You’re doing in me. I say yes. I don’t understand but I say yes. I want to say yes to You. I always want to say yes to You. You are the only one for me. I love You. You are my beloved. Cause me to fall deeper in love with You.
I AM. Those are the prayers that bring Me such delight. Valerie, I AM so pleased with You. I can’t be any more pleased or any less pleased than I AM right now. You are My Child. You belong to Me. You have captured My heart and I am capturing yours.
Cause me to hear Your lovingkindness in the morning. For in You do I trust; Cause me to know the way in which I should walk, for I lift up my soul to You. Psalm 143:8
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